Friday, September 10, 2010

Decision Time


So…I have been thinking.

I know.

That could be dangerous.

But I have been.

Sometimes it has been while waiting in the carpool lane.

(The carpool lanes I should say. At three different schools. But that is another post. For another time. Be jealous.)

Other times I have awakened in the middle of the night.


And in the midst of all this cerebral activity I have come up with a solution to one of my many problems.

No… not split ends.

Or teeth whitening.

You see, I suffer from indecisiveness.

Simply put: I can’t make a decision.

Without worrying.

And fretting.

And chewing the inside of my cheek.

So in all my thinking…

I have come to the conclusion….

that what I really need is to hire a decision maker.

I am not looking for someone to decide the big stuff.

I can do that.

Want more babies?


Want to make more money?


I am looking for someone to make small daily decisions on my behalf.

Like what should I eat for breakfast?

Or should I eat at all?

What should I wear?

Should I work today or try to catch up on my homework?

What color should I paint the bathroom?

Should I cook or call for take-out?

Pepsi or Coke?

Paper or Plastic?

You see where I am going with this.

So, send me your resumes.

Only serious decision makers need apply.

No flip floppers wanted.

That is all.